Living in the Here and Now

I am a counsellor who specialises in Gestalt therapy, working mainly with my clients in the here and now building their self awareness about their own thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations in the present moment.

I have noticed for myself and for others that being in the present moment is sometimes challenging. It’s easy to get caught up in our busy daily lives juggling deadlines and responsibilities. There are often distractions which lead us to worry about the future or the past which stop us from experiencing what is happening in the here and now. Sometimes when we are feeling unpleasant emotions we try to escape and suppress them by eating, drinking alcohol or taking drugs to take away the pain we are feeling.

With the growth of social media and increasing pace of life it’s become really easy to forget what’s important in life. I am sure lots of people (including myself) have been spending time with our children whilst also replying to text messages, or watching a film with a partner and scrolling through social media, or going out for a walk whilst chatting on the phone, stopping us from appreciating the world around us.

I have noticed whilst eating my lunch I would scroll through my phone not being aware how much I was eating causing me to over-eat as I had missed the feeling of being full. Through self awareness I have learned to bring myself back to the present moment at times when I am distracted or if my mind is wandering.

Whilst I was away on holiday I made a promise to myself that I would try to be more present and try to multitask less. It takes a lot of practice and self awareness to be in the present moment, noticing when our minds get pulled away and then bringing ourselves back to the here and now. I have been able to enjoy the taste of delicious meals and feel full, I have felt the warmth of the sunshine on my skin, and I have been able to engage in deep and meaningful conversations with my family and friends giving them my undivided attention. I have been listening more attentively which has helped me appreciate the people around me and feel more fulfilled in my relationships.

I am sitting here writing this blog having given myself time to do this. I now have more time in the day to be present with myself which has given me a deeper sense of contentment and personal satisfaction. Being present doesn’t just benefit me but it benefits other people in my life as they are getting more of my attention as I am not distracted by something else whilst spending time with them. I am building stronger relationships with my family and friends. Engaging in the present moment means people feel like they are important to me.

Living in the present benefits our mental health and relationships, helping to appreciate life more, makes us feel more satisfied and slows us down.

Try using some of my tips below that will help you stay in the present moment:

1) Mindful breathing – Focusing on the feeling of inhaling and exhaling each breath. This helps to bring you back to the present moment and calm your mind

2) Stay fully present in conversation – Be aware of your thoughts and emotions. Notice any distractions of wandering thoughts and bring yourself back to the present moment

3) Body scan – Scanning your body to observe how it is feeling and listen to what it is telling you

4) Spend less time on social media as it can be distracting

5) Focus on one task at a time

6) Journaling is a very good way to pay attention to your thoughts and feelings

7) Read a relaxing book

8) Go for a walk taking in all of the sights, smells and sounds around you

If you would like some help to live a more fulfilling life please contact me:

https://www.melaniesanderstherapy.co.uk

Melanie Sanders

Counsellor

MBACP (Accredited)

07958 365730